I stepped out of the shower feeling refreshed and anew. My day was beginning to make sense and I was loving it. I footed into the kitchen, looked around and beheld the messy situation of the kitchen. I hissed out loud. “You all should try and do some justice to this kitchen please.” I shouted and my voice echoed to the whole house. Nobody answered though I was sure they heard me. I advanced towards the sink, looked in it and saw plates somehow arranged. Somebody was there, I said to myself. On a second thought I discarded the feeling as Paul was good in arranging the plates in the sink and putting water in them but never cared to wash. I turned on the tap and soaked the sponge in water. Picked the liquid soap and soaked the sponge with it. Just then the kitchen door that led to the backyard opened and Eric walked in with the waste bin. I was shocked once again. This new girl must be really special for Eric to be putting up all these good boy acts.

“I don’t think we need a passing change in this house.” I told him as I dropped the sponge and washed my hands.

“Where are you going to?” he asked me.

“Impress your girl bro.” I answered and moved out of the kitchen into the lounge. Frank was still watching his movie. As I opened the fridge, he turned to look at me. He saw me brought out two eggs from the fridge.

“Make it four bro.” He said.

“Watch your movie.” I replied as I took two eggs more and locked the fridge. I saw him smile as I moved back into the kitchen. Eric was standing by the sink washing the plates. He turned to look at me and I faced off. Moved to the plate rack and took one deep plate and broke the egg inside.

“Seriously?” he said drawing my attention. I looked at him and shrugged. “The last time I checked, we were three in this house and we still are.” He said.

“Hey! Your girl is coming. I don’t think you should bother about food. She is going to make some for you and definitely for us.”

The surprise on his face was surprising. I could not start to envision its level. He stared at me with a scowl like I have said some abominable things. Girls are supposed to be better cooks and there is nothing wrong with a girl cooking in his boyfriend’s house. Frank’s girlfriend I recalled makes us feels like we are in the village whenever she comes. “What?” I halted his insane stare. “She is a girl so she should know how to cook.”

“This generation?” he asked with an increased shock. “You better wake up. Just take a look though the window, into the streets and see the stature, composure and appearances of the girls of this cohort whom you attribute cooking skills to.”

I obviously did not understand that. What is a man doing with a girl who does not know how to cook? Why would a girl not even know how to cook? I remembered my family when we were growing up. I was the last of six children of my parents; three boys and three girl, perfect match. The three boys were never allowed to enter the kitchen except on emergency. And the girls, they dare not miss the preparation of any meal unless officially exempted. Mother made it as a family policy that all of them must know how to cook as she claimed a woman can use her kitchen to reduce her husband’s flirty nature. They learnt it with good heart and now they all were good cooks. So I marvelled at what Eric said with utmost shock. “You mean she doesn’t know how to cook?” I suddenly asked ejecting myself out of the history valley I have sunk into.

“Of course she doesn’t know how to cook.” He said and I gaped. “Which girl knows how to cook in this generation where everything is made so easy to the extent you can even order a pot of soup online?”

I shook my head and silently continued with what I was doing. He definitely was joking and I was too hungry to engage in that argument. I spiced the egg and stirred it. As I turned to pick the frying pan, Eric was still looking at me. “What is it? Aren’t we done with this?” I queried feeling uncomfortable with the stare.

“With that? Yes. But with this” he said pointing at the egg on the cabinet. “We are not.”

“In a simpler way please.”

“I am hungry too.” He emphasized.

I knew that was the reason behind all the act but I just ignored him hoping he would forget but I guess I was wrong. I inhaled. “I am nobody’s cook in this house. For the fact that staying in the kitchen was my hobby when I was growing up due to the extra meat and fish I get to eat before the real meal doesn’t mean I love cooking.” I said that out very loud; not shouting and not whispering either. I had to make that known to avoid further messaging. I took the frying pan and turned toward the gas cookers; Frank was standing there looking at me with a mischievous smile on his face. “Even you too!” I said and laid the pan on top the cooker.

“You are supposed to be happy that we are enjoying your meal even.” He said and starched out his hand. He was having two eggs on it. I looked at him angrily and Eric shouted in admiration.

“I knew you will always get my back buddy.” Eric said and continued washing.

I took the eggs, broke it into the plate and stirred it together with the already stirred one. I turned on the cooker and fried the egg while Eric washed the Plates. Frank returned to the lounge and continued with the movie. I finished and served the meal, we all ate and dispersed into the rooms leaving the properly cleaned room for Eric. I lied on the bed and slept with Frank lying on the floor.

We were all far asleep when a sudden knock came on the door. I jumped up, angry at the rush and audacity with which the knock came. I stood up, with my hand rubbing my eyes and headed toward the entrance door. “Who is there?” I asked. A feminine voice answered from outside. I knew instantly that Eric’s girl has arrived. I opened the door; she gawked. Her weave on was longer than all weave-on I have ever seen, her lips blood red. She blinked and her eyes lashes stood like starched cloth. Her face was shining from the over laying foundation she applied. Then she smiled revealing her dentition and her lips which were nothing enticing at all. I wondered if Eric was stupid to have developed any kind of feeling for someone like this. She was fair but that fairness was not natural. It was then that I understood why Eric was seriously protesting against her knowing how to cook; a girl with this kind of appearance definitely would not know how to light a matches.

“Hi!” she said waving her left hand. I saw only nails as she waved; long polished nails. What is exactly wrong with the girl of this cohort? What beauty does that add to them? She was irritating to me so I quickly dismissed her by ushering him into the lounge after she had asked if Eric was at home.

“I will inform Eric of you arrival.” I told her as she opened her lips in what seemed like a smile. She sat down majestically scanning the room with this strange expression that could mean the house was below her taste. I shook my head and walked inside.

Eric was lying down on the floor when I entered the room. It was funny to me that he chose to lie on the floor because he did not want to scatter the bed. I giggled as I taped him. He sleepily opened his eyes.

“She is here.” I told him and he jumped up.

“Where is she?” she asked in excitement and shock mixed together.

“In the lounge of course.”

He quickly rushed into the bathroom and washed his face.

“Why were you lying on the floor after the stressed dressing of the bed?” I asked him.

He feigned deafness to my question and walked out of the room. I laughed. Suddenly he rushed back in.

“Be sure to leave before we return.” He said and walked away.
“At you back dude.” I replied as I locked the door and walked into the other room.

….the story continues…


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